I Will Not be Frugal

In my seminal post, Frugal Sucks!, I outlined the negative connotations that the word "frugal" brings to my mind. I know not everyone has such strong reaction to the term, but from the state personal finances and debt in the US, I think many people do. Yet what we do instead (mindless consuming, borrowing, spending) is driving us to the brink of both financial and spiritual ruin.

I've made a personal commitment not to be frugal, but instead to be prosperous and thrifty. But what are the differences? Here's my list of the DON'Ts of negative frugality, along with my concurrent DOs of prosperity and thrift:

• Deprivation -- being frugal means you are deprived of things.
  
  Prosperity means that you define deprivation based on your own sustainability and happiness... not the definitions provided my glossy magazines or television. Only you can decide what is really enough, but you are allowed to enjoy those things that bring you lasting pleasure.
  
  Being thrifty means you choose the option that's the best intersection of price AND quality and you care for it and make it last. One $20 shirt is better than four $5 shirts and I know myself well enough to know that 3 hours in a thrift store looking for a nice $1 shirt will NOT make me happy. And frozen burritos may be cheaper than fresh fruit, but my health will pay in the long run.
  

• Missed opportunity -- frugal means you miss out on things you want to do because those things cost too much money.
  
  Prosperity means that you can assign value to experience just as to material goods. And each person must decide for themselves which experiences have value. It also means having a lifestyle that affords the ability to take advantage of new experience when it arises. That means sustainability as well as fiscal responsibility.
  
  A thrifty viewpoint however realizes that some of the best experiences cost very little (a little gas, a small fee, a bit of time) and are still well worth exploring.
  
  
• Selfishness -- frugality is all about looking out only for number one, preparing for your own future and letting others fend for themselves.
  
  Prosperity takes a broader view. Having a prosperous household or business means living in a prosperous community, which means helping others. Plus giving has value in and of itself and brings rewards both monetary and spiritual.
  
  Thrift realizes that while prudent spending and saving is critical, in the end you leave this world as you arrived: naked and empty-handed. Leaving a legacy is a chance to give prosperity to those you care about most.
  
  
• Tedium -- frugal means always doing the same thing because it's cheap and just what you do. Experimenting costs money because, hey, what if you mess up!?
  
  Prosperity admits the constancy of change. While it's a good idea to stockpile when there's a surplus, it's also the time to try new things because failure is more tolerable. Then, if or when the tide turns, you will be well prepared to change with the shifting currents.
  
  Being thrifty doesn't mean you never make mistakes, and failure is simply practice for success. Embracing new things in a moderate way is a great method way of supporting positive change. You don't have to invest every resource to learn from your mistakes and enjoy your successes.
  
  
• Lack of choices -- if you are frugal, you can only do the cheapest thing. Each choice closes off every other choice and you can't ever change it.
  
  Prosperity affords you options. Your good planning can be used to open doors and, because change is always occurring, new options will soon present themselves. It's OK to make a more expensive choice, or a higher risk one, as long as you do it with full awareness.
  
  And thrift means living simply so that the occasional poor choice isn't the end of the world.
  
  
• Deferred living -- work and scrimp today so that you can enjoy tomorrow... except tomorrow never seems to come until you're too old to enjoy it.
  
  Prosperity means nothing today if you don't plan for tomorrow. It's a sustainable and ongoing process for enjoying the present and the future. Each day could be your last... but it's also the first day of the rest of your life. Live as if both these things were true.
  
  Thrift cautions us to be moderate, neither sacrificing today for the future nor hocking our future for the pleasures of today.
  
  
• No room to dream or grow -- dreams cost money. Trying stuff out costs money. Failure costs money. Best to just stick to what you know will bring you money. Risk is bad!
  
  Prosperity is about a life that has room for making dreams comes true. Dreams don't cost money. Dreams are free to everyone who dares to dream them. Making dreams come true may come with a cost, but like any choice or good or service, the cost might be well worth the reward. Giving yourself permission to be prosperous means you can give yourself permission to dream.
  
  And the thrifty lifestyle? Without a lot of burden and clutter, life can be a place where there's room for dreaming, trying, failing, and -- we hope -- succeeding.